on running into

i was flying down the street in an attempt to catch a bus when i heard a voice holler "mellish!" i turned, and recognized a guy i went to high school with. he's a decent guy, but it sucks just the same, you know? well, we start to rap, but unfortunately, diddy wasn't around to produce it. he asks me "what i'm up to?" i know this is code for "are you making any money? are you a success?" but i play it literally. "i'm just coming from my parents house. i try to get over there a couple of nights a week." he nods, and continues. "besides that, what else are you doing?" i didn't have the heart to tell him "reading, blogging, listening to jazz, rooting against the celtics, and watching porn" so i gave in. "i work at brookline high." he assumed from this that i teach there. he rode me a little for not working in boston. supposedly, i should be "giving something back." well, the fact is, i don't have the slightest idea what i took, so what am i supposed to give back? motherfucker, i live in boston! seriously, the irony of a black guy bagging a jewish guy on "selling out" has a kind of charm, so it didn't really bother me. if i could only sell out for more than 13:40 an hour. in any case, i told him that i tried boston, but that brookline called back, and boston didn't. for his part, he is "going back to school, getting my masters." in an awkward slip of the tongue, i asked "what are you in for?"

his girlfriend showed up, gave me a "who the fuck is this cracker" look, which was one of the highlights of the whole thing. seemed like a nice young woman. than, the obligatory struggle over accepting a ride home. he insisted. i refused. the woman wanted to move on. he persisted further. i held strong. he got my number though. i felt funny giving a fake one. i walked off, the cool air a close friend.

the thing is, he's a good guy. big smile, warm greeting, full of fond memories.

and yet, agony is agony.

"what have i been up to?" trying not to jump, pal.

he probably wouldn't have dug it.