walking

walking down comm ave, the girls of boston university surround me. they are a satisfied bunch, considering the world is saturated with sadness. they have a sameness to them. they are all white, regardless of their race. they are wealthy, well fed, ravishing robots. i quicken my pace, but they are everywhere. it's not their fault that they are robots, but they bother still. i want to shout. they hurry by, chatting on cell phones. the streets belong to them. they nudge you out of the way. no one has ever told them no. they have everything, except happiness. they know it all, except the truth. i wonder, where are all the men? don't young men go to school too? don't they walk down streets too? of course, they are also hateful in their generic white t shirts and their dockers and their bum look that costs hundreds. these are our good germans, busy fighting their battles, whatever they are. they are studying for tests, falling in love, talking, walking.

was i that hateful?

class today. kids were telling me how to teach the class, how to make it interesting. one of these days they will learn that it's all bullshit anyway. i tell them that i am thinking of coming to class in a bathing suit to liven things up. or maybe i will hire a chorus line. i tell a joke, which really happened. i was standing on a platform waiting for the train when a kid comes by and says "hey man, i like your boots. are they timberlands?" i pull my pant leg up over the label of the boot, read it, and then say "tomberlinds." the hipster looks away, somewhat thrown, as he has already admitted to liking a "bootleg" product. by the way, i got them at payless for 20 bucks. i shouldn't brag, they were probably made by some 12 year old girl in vietnam. i wonder what ho chi minh would be thinking now?

i just ordered fidel's autobiography from the library. the only problem is i already have 10 books out. well, i guess that doesn't rank high on a list of tragedies.

it is weird being in front of high school students, as a "teacher." what is there to teach? follow your heart, find a passion, and shit on the sacred cows. what else can i tell you? more and more i go through the motions. what the hell, the kids are cool and it's good pocket change. besides, they seem to think i'm ok.

maybe they are right

i hope so