just a piece in a puzzle

they changed my schedule today. there was no notice. dude claimed he had been trying to reach me, but i'm always in the same place.

it really doesn't matter, but the kids wondered where i was. it matters to them. they haven't learned yet that we are all just parts on a giant chess board. when they decide to move us, we move. every once in a while, we refuse to move, but those times are exceedingly rare. in this case, it all seemed a bit silly. the teachers who were introduced to me where unaware that i would be joining them. friendly fascism, if you will. i felt as if i were a bit player in a marx brothers routine. it couldn't be taken seriously. where i am doesn't seem to much matter. that i have to be anywhere is the real crime. that i have to get up in the morning, put on my clothes, catch the bus, and take direction from men and women who aren't worthy of scratching my ass, is the problem of all problems.

and yet, the kids don't know yet. and it's sweet. they like you. they don't care that you are only a para. to them, all that counts is that you are a good guy. and we teach them.

so, i will be in some different classes from now on. mellish the gypsy. if only i could play blues for ike. as oppression goes, it ain't much. but, it would be nice to determine my own movements.

as it was, i was sitting in the teacher's lounge, listening to gene ammons, when a bearded man with a voice higher than little anthony, approached, claiming he wanted to talk to me. in actuality, he didn't want to talk to me, but to the position i hold. very few people want to talk to me, but that may be for the best. the bearded wonder laid out his plan, seemingly improvised on the spot. zoot sims he wasn't.

and so it goes. i'm just another piece of the puzzle. i can be moved whenever "they" decide i should be moved. there is sadness to it, and humor as well. it's meaningless and profound, simple and complex. like everything else.

they own me from 8:20 to 2:45, as long as they don't personally insult me.

they can impersonally insult me all they want.

sad, but true.

by the way, i told the kids that they would see me around. that i would drop by, still bring my basketball, sing in the hallway, all of that.

i'm still here, folks.

kind of.